Prepare a parent for moving day by telling them exactly what will happen, in order, more than once; deciding together where they will be while the crew works; packing their essentials bag; and arranging for the new room to be set up before they arrive or soon after. Predictability is what helps most — far more than reassurance.
Every family is different, and your parent may want to be in the middle of everything or nowhere near it. Both are fine. What matters is that the plan is theirs too.
Walk Through the Day in Advance
A week or two before, sit down and go through the day as it will actually happen: what time the movers arrive, how many people, what they will do first, when the truck leaves, when it arrives at the new place, and when the bed will be made.
Repeat it in the days that follow, and answer the same question the same way each time. A day that can be pictured is far less frightening than one that has only been called "moving day". Our guide on helping a senior manage moving anxiety goes into this in more depth.
Decide Where Your Parent Will Be
A house full of movers, cartons and propped-open doors is not a safe or restful place for someone unsteady on their feet. Some families arrange for a parent to spend the morning with a relative or friend, or to go ahead to the residence for lunch while the truck is loaded.
Others want to stay and watch, and that can be fine too. Set up one quiet room or chair out of the walkways, with water and a phone, and let the crew know so they work around it. Either way, decide in advance rather than on the morning.
Give Them a Role if They Want One
Being moved can feel like being managed. A real job helps: directing where furniture goes in the new suite, choosing which photographs go up first, checking the kitchen boxes, or simply being the person who says when the room is right.
The crew can take direction from your parent on placement just as easily as from you. Tell them who is deciding.
Pack the Essentials Bag Together
This bag stays with your parent or with one family member all day. Our moving-day essentials bag guide has a longer list.
- Medications for several days, in their original containers
- Glasses, hearing aids, dentures and chargers
- A change of clothes, nightwear and toiletries
- Phone, charger and a list of key numbers
- Important documents and keys
- Something comforting — a book, a small photo, a favourite mug
Confirm the Residence's Arrangements
Check that the elevator is booked, the move-in window is confirmed, and the residence knows when your parent will arrive. Ask whether a staff member will meet them, whether a meal will be available that evening, and how medications are handed over if the residence manages them.
Share the residence contact with your mover, and the mover's contact with the residence, so problems are solved without anyone needing to find you.
Plan the Room to Be Ready
The first evening sets the tone. Decide on the four or five things that must be in place before anyone leaves: the bed made, the chair by the window, the lamp working, the photographs out, the television on. Ask your mover to load those items so they come off first.
If you have arranged unpacking and setup, the room can be largely finished the same day. If not, unpack the bedroom and bathroom first and leave the rest for later in the week.
On the Morning
- Keep breakfast and medications on their usual schedule
- Put the essentials bag by the door or in the car
- Introduce your parent to the crew lead
- Do a quick walk-through with the crew of what stays and what goes
- Give your parent an easy exit from the busy parts of the house
After Everyone Leaves
If you can, stay for the first evening — have dinner, watch something familiar, and make sure the call bell, phone and lights are all within easy reach. The first night in a new place is often the hardest. Our guide on the first week in a retirement suite covers what to set up next.
Walk them through the day until it is predictable, decide where they will be, give them a real role, pack the essentials bag, and make sure the room is ready before the evening.
Moving Mom or Dad? We plan the day carefully, take direction from your parent, and set up the room so it feels like theirs.